Ms. Cranky, one of the ladies I take care of, likes her rum. She has a few shots each night before she goes to bed. Not getting her rum makes her even more cranky than she usually is - not that she's an alcoholic, she's not, she just gets more cranky when she doesn't get her way about anything.
She also has a habit of accusing the last staff person who worked of stealing anything that she can't immediately find. Last weekend the rum went missing after my shift. You guessed it, Ms. Cranky was on the phone with one of my coworkers saying, 'If that b%#@& took my rum I'll kick her a#@". It was not actually missing, the lady who worked the shift after mine put it away in a different place and Ms. Cranky soon had her rum back. That's usually how things "go missing". With several staff, no one ever seems to put anything back in the same place.
Last night when I went in to work my shift my coworker told me of all of this. We laughed. She couldn't believe that Ms. Cranky would accuse me, of all people, of stealing her rum. I said, "Shoot, I wouldn't take her rum, I'd rather leave it here and give it to her so she'll sleep and leave me alone". We both laughed and agreed that that bottle of rum is our best friend - and neither of us drink.